[Zoom Meeting] OCPD & Judgments ⚖️

When it comes to the 8 diagnostic criteria for OCPD, I feel like it doesn’t take me much effort to find a common thread of “judgment” within each of them. The act of judging feels so pervasive and effortless, so it’s somewhat relieving to know that I’m not alone in this human experience, even if seem to excel at it! (/sarcasm)

judg·ment

the ability to make considered decisions or come to sensible conclusions.
an opinion or conclusion.
a decision of a court or judge.
a misfortune or calamity viewed as a divine punishment.

Personally, I’d like to focus on how, through cultivating mindful awareness, we have the ability to enter into and engage with the world in a less or even non-judging state. I was first introduced to this concept through Acceptance And Commitment Therapy (ACT), where one of its 6 core processes is Being Present.

“Being Present can be understood as the practice of being aware of the present moment, without judging the experience. In other words, it involves experiencing what is happening without trying to predict or change the experience.”

If you have the time, I encourage you to explore the ACT link as well as each of the links below. Unfortunately, I only have the time/energy to provide these little snapshots at this time (and I’m making an effort to not pass a moral judgment/criticism upon myself for those limitations). My hope is that you’re able to engage with these resources to some degree and that they’ll help facilitate our upcoming Zoom meeting discussion. Enjoy!

https://mindvoyage.in/the-psychology-of-judging-others

The Psychology of Judging Others

Judging is Natural
Scientific studies have indicated that judgment is a natural instinct of the human brain. As humans, surviving and thriving are our basic instincts. As a consequence, we automatically end up judging people around us to determine if they are safe to be with. Research conducted at New York University shows that our brain begins to label people trustworthy or untrustworthy even before we get time to consciously analyze their faces. This study highlights the fact that judgment is natural and instinct-based.

https://mindfulambition.net/non-judgment/

Non-Judgment: What is it? And Why Does it Matter? (4 Benefits)

The mind is a judging machine.

Everything that we experience is filtered, categorized, and dealt with in some automatic way.

Some things are judged as “good”, so we grasp for more, and cling to what we have. Other things are judged as “bad”, so we hide, resist, and run away from them. And everything else? That’s judged as “neutral”, so for the most part, we ignore it entirely.

https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/non-judgement.html

Video: Non-judgment in mindfulness

Non-judgement. Jon Kabat-Zinn. Non-judgmental Awareness – Habits of Mind –

https://www.berkeleywellbeing.com/non-judgement.html

A Mindfulness Practice for Nonjudgmental Awareness

Explore this 15-minute guided meditation to open up some space for yourself to sit with what is, rather than what if.

“Meditation is the chance to practice giving ourselves permission to feel exactly what we feel, even when we’re not as okay as we’d like to be.”

Reflection Questions

After you’ve had a chance to read through some of the linked articles:

  • How often do feel like you’re engaging in judging?
  • As you reflect on your own pattern of judging, what does it seem to be motivated by?
  • Are there aspects of your life that provoke more or less judging?
  • Have you noticed if your judgments are fueled by internal or external expectations or beliefs?
  • Have you noticed any shortcomings from your pattern of judging?
  • What, if anything, has allowed you to lessen or release judgments?
  • How do you think society and your early life experiences have influenced the types of judgments you make?

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[Zoom Meeting] OCPD & Self-Reflection 🤔

If self-reflection were ever a competitive Olympic sport, I’d like to think that I’d probably take gold! 😝 However, it wasn’t until I started prepping for this topic that I fully realized how it can be a double-edged sword.

On one hand, I’ve greatly benefited from self-reflection in the context of regular journaling and talk therapy while, on the other hand, I’ve also suffered immensely from rampant rumination, comparison, and negative self-talk over the course of my life. I’ve found I naturally skew toward more introspection and sometimes that can allow me to discover the source of my emotional distress, while other times it might look more like wallowing in self-pity and negativity. Ultimately, I believe self-reflection, when engaged in consciously, offers us the ability to develop greater self-awareness and emotional intelligence which, in turn, can also improve our interpersonal relationships.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-reflection

Wikipedia: Self-Reflection

Self-reflection is the ability to witness and evaluate one’s own cognitive, emotional, and behavioural processes. In psychology, other terms used for this self-observation include ‘reflective awareness’, and ‘reflective consciousness’, which originate from the work of William James.[2][3]

Self-reflection depends upon a range of functions, including introspection and metacognition, which develop from infancy through adolescence, affecting how individuals interact with others, and make decisions.[4]

As a small aside: one interesting aspect of self-reflection is how it relates to metacognition, “an awareness of one’s thought processes and an understanding of the patterns behind them.” I find the whole concept of metacognition to be fascinating development of human consciousness. We get to think about our thoughts?! How trippy! How nebulous! It takes a great deal of discipline to steer our minds towards constructive self-reflection and away from the pitfalls of rumination.

https://www.verywellmind.com/self-reflection-importance-benefits-and-strategies-7500858

Note: the following is an abridged copy, I strongly encourage you to read the full webpage if you have the time!

The Importance of Self-Reflection: How Looking Inward Can Improve Your Mental Health

What is it?

“Self-reflection involves being present with yourself and intentionally focusing your attention inward to examine your thoughts, feelings, actions, and motivations, says Angeleena Francis, LMHC, executive director for AMFM Healthcare.”

“Without self-reflection, you would continue to do what you’ve always done and as a result, you may continue to face the same problems you’ve always faced.”

Benefits of Self-Reflection

These are some of the benefits of self-reflection, according to the experts:

  • Increased self-awareness
  • Greater sense of control
  • Improved communication skills
  • Deeper alignment with core values
  • Better decision-making skills
  • Greater accountability
When Self-Reflection Becomes Unhealthy

Self-reflection is a healthy practice that is important for mental well-being. However, it can become harmful if it turns into rumination, self-criticism, self-judgment, negative self-talk, and comparison to others, says Wilson.

So what questions would even be helpful regarding self-reflection? A quick google search returned several extensive lists so perhaps a general note of caution about not diving straight into the metaphorical deep end and overwhelm yourself right off the bat. Like most growth disciplines, self-reflection is something that we can slowly develop our capacity for over time. That being said, here are some great questions from the following link:

(Self) Reflection Questions

https://positivepsychology.com/introspection-self-reflection

  • Using 10 words, describe yourself.
  • I couldn’t imagine living without…
  • Am I letting matters that are out of my control stress me out?
  • What am I really scared of?
  • What do I want most in life?
  • Am I putting enough effort into my relationships?
  • If my body could talk, it would say…
  • What do you love about life?
  • Name what is enough for you.

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